Friday, October 9, 2009

SHY IS NOTHING MORE THAN A LIMITING LABEL

I am one of those people who unfortunately spent most of my life defining myself by what others called me or even self imposed labels that are very limiting. Perhaps the most debilitating label I slapped on myself was the term SHY.

Anytime we allow ourselves to be labeled, we make ourselves "smaller" to fit the label (because in reality we are too complex to ever truly fit any label). To fit this label, I made it very difficult on myself to do many of the things I hoped to. I would never raise my hand in class (never mind speak out!), struggled to build friendships, and hid behind my poor mother's legs if she even dared try to introduce me to someone.

One specific example I can think of was the time I wanted to try out for a town play. My parents took me to the audition at the high school, we went through the registration process, and my name was called out several times. Each time I said I wasn’t ready to audition yet. Finally (at least 6 hours later!), the last person completed their audition and I still could not bring myself to climb the steps to the stage. Those three little steps might as well have been Mt. Kilimanjaro! My parents stayed at my side the entire time and then drove me home as I berated myself for not even trying.

I battled this self imposed label for years, but have made a decision to stop using this word as a description for myself. I made a breakthrough and will never use the word shy as a label for myself. I may still have feelings of insecurity now and then (that's normal), but "shy" is no longer a label that defines me. Now I LOVE standing up before a group of children or parents and speaking about topics I am passionate about and I'm glad to say I am happier and more fulfilled because of it.

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